Book jokes and humor

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Any book with George Washington’s writing in it is worth thousands of dollars.
Any book with my writing in it is worth two weeks of detention.

My lunch leaked all over my schoolbooks.
I now have the only geography book where the map of Turkey is covered with gravy.

We have to carry heavy books home, then we have to carry heavy books back to school in the morning.
If the authorities knew this was going to happen, why didn’t they build the school closer to us?

What do librarians hang over their babies’ cribs?
Bookmobiles.

What has a spine but no bones?
A book.

Why did the Rumanian stop reading for the night?
To give his Bucharest (book a rest).

Why was the library so messy?
Because it was full of litter ature.

What would you get if you crossed a comedian and an Edgar Allan Poe story?
The wit and the pendulum.

What would you get if you crossed a locomotive with the author of Tom Sawyer?
A choo choo Twain.

How did the author of Tom Sawyer learn to ride a bicycle?
With Twain ing wheels.