Hedonist:
A person who never noes what he likes. – Joseph Leff

Heirloom
Weaving machine for rabbits

Helium
What a medicine man tries to do.

Helix:
How a dog greets his master. – Joseph Leff

Heman:
Not she woman. – Joseph Leff

Henhouse Fun:
Fowl play. – Joseph Leff

Hennery:
Hank’s real name. – Joseph Leff

Henry David Thireau:
Henry David is painstakingly accurate. – Joseph Leff

Herbal:
Introduicing Herbert to Alvin. – Joseph Leff

Herbalists:
Believers in Herb. – Joseph Leff

Herbicide. To kill everyone named Herbert. – Joseph Leff

Here in Paris:
Ici. – Joseph Leff

Herein:
The king’s in charge. – Joseph Leff

Herman:
A husband. – Joseph Leff

Hermit
(1) A lady’s glove
(2) A German baseball player’s glove. – Joseph Leff

Hernia:
Pertaining to a female’s knee. – Joseph Leff

Hero Sandwich
What brave soldiers eat.

Herod:
She strange. – Joseph Leff

Heroes:
(1) What a man in a boat does.
(2) Male lobster eggs. – Joseph Leff

Heroin:
The courageous chap is here. – Joseph Leff

Heroism:
A belief in submarine sandwiches. – Joseph Leff

Herring:
A bride’s wedding band. – Joseph Leff

He’s Always Making Faces:
A sculptor. – Joseph Leff

He’s Batty:
Dracula, on some nights. – Joseph Leff

He’s Often at Home:
An umpire. – Joseph Leff

He’s Revolting!:
A rebel. – Joseph Leff

Hey, You:
The chemical symbol for gold. – Joseph Leff

HI:
Abbrev. for Hawaii. – Joseph Leff

Hialeah:
A greeting for Leah. – Joseph Leff

Hideaway:
Nobody else can see your scale. – Joseph Leff

Hideout for Yemeni Crooks:
Aden of thieves. – Joseph Leff

Hierarchy:
Employ Archie. – Joseph Leff

High Art:
Hello, Arthur. – Joseph Leff

High Bar:
Himalayan tavern. – Joseph Leff

High Birth:
A dock that’s way upstream. – Joseph Leff

High Mass:
Led by a drunken priest. – Joseph Leff

High Noon
Midday on Mt. Everest.

High Seas:
C, C, C on Mt. Kilimanjaro. – Joseph Leff

High Tea:
A beverage served in the Alps. – Joseph Leff

High Time:
Noon. – Joseph Leff

High Treason:
Telling Junior not to climb it. – Joseph Leff

Highbred:
Important part of an Alpine sandwich. – Joseph Leff

Highflier:
An astronaut. – Joseph Leff

Hijack:
Hello, John. – Joseph Leff

Hilarity:
Pertaining to Hilary. – Joseph Leff

Hip Joint:
A real cool bar. – Joseph Leff

Hippies
The things you hang your leggies on

Hispanic:
His terror. – Joseph Leff

Hiss:
Not hearse. – Joseph Leff

Historians
People who won’t let bygones be bygones.

History:
Not to be confused with her story. – Joseph Leff

Hit Song
A tune that stops being popular by the time you learn the words.

Hit The Deck:
What a losing poker player might do. – Joseph Leff

Hobo
A road’s scholar.

Hog-Tied:
Wrapped in bacon. – Joseph Leff

Hogwash
A pig’s laundry