Optical
Tickle an opera singer
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Optimism
The cheerful spirit that makes it possible for a kettle to whistle with boiling water up its nose
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Optimist
(1) A hope addict
(2) A man who goes downstairs with a fish pole when he finds his basement flooded.
(3) One who spends his last dollar to buy a money belt.
(4) A person who goes into a restaurant with no money and figures on paying for his meal with the pearl he hopes to find in the oyster he plans to order.
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Optometrist:
A person of vision. – Joseph Leff
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Optometrist’s Office:
A site for sore eyes. – Joseph Leff
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Optometrist’s Top Floor Office:
A vision aerie. – Joseph Leff
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Opus:
An exclamation at the sight of infected tissue fluids. – Joseph Leff
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Orange
A fruit with a lot of appeal.
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Orate:
Six or seven… – Joseph Leff
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Oratory:
Is he a Whig…? – Joseph Leff
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Orchestra Banned From the Telly:
Too much sax and violins. – Joseph Leff
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Ordain:
A Scandinavian could be a Swede, a Norwegian… – Joseph Leff
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Ordinary Son:
An heir plain. – Joseph Leff
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Ore:
(1) Mined-over matter.
(2) A load off one’s mine. – Joseph Leff
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Organ Grinder
Monster with food processor
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Oriental Fans
Chinese movie buffs.
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Osmosis
How Moses introduced himself to Pharaoh.
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Ottoman
A car mechanic
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Ouch
The sound heard when two porcupines kiss.
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Ouija:
How to say “yes” in French and German. – Joseph Leff
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Out Of Bounds
An exhausted kangaroo
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Out of Patience:
A retired doctor. – Joseph Leff
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Out on a Limb:
Asleep on a branch. – Joseph Leff
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Outclass:
A course in environmental studies. – Joseph Leff
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Outrageous:
To have a bigger tantrum than we can. – Joseph Leff
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Outright:
Win an essay contest. – Joseph Leff
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Outside:
Won a groaning contest. – Joseph Leff
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Outweigh:
Exit. – Joseph Leff
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