Pilotage:
How old Pontius was. – Joseph Leff

Pine
What sad fir trees do

Ping-Pong
Table tennis played by skunks

Pinhead:
Bowling addict. – Joseph Leff

Pins and Needles:
In an acupuncturist’s supply cabinet. – Joseph Leff

Pioneer
What a sloppy pie eater gets.

Pious:
A request for dessert. – Joseph Leff

Pipe Dreams
What plumbers have when they sleep.

Pipecleaner
A toothpick wearing long woolly underwear

Pirate’s Parrot:
Personal fowl. – Joseph Leff

Piteous:
Feel sorry for us. – Joseph Leff

Piton:
3.142 times 2000 pounds. – Joseph Leff

Pixy:
Select the 26th letter. – Joseph Leff

Pizzicato
Pizza for cats

Placate:
Perform the female lead in “The Taming of the Shrew.” – Joseph Leff

Placing:
To perform in a musical drama. – Joseph Leff

Plain Dealing:
What a flight deck is for. – Joseph Leff

Plains Indians:
Native American aviators. – Joseph Leff

Plaintiff:
An ordinary dispute. – Joseph Leff

Planet:
To form a method or scheme beforehand. – Joseph Leff

Planking:
An expert strategist. – Joseph Leff

Plankton:
2000 pounds of lumber. – Joseph Leff

Plant Cells:
A factory brig. – Joseph Leff

Plant Manager:
A gardener. – Joseph Leff

Plasma
Mum made by a plastic surgeon

Plateau:
The highest form of flattery. – Joseph Leff

Play Place:
A stage. – Joseph Leff

Playgrounds:
Actors’ coffee. – Joseph Leff

Playmate:
To act as a spouse. – Joseph Leff

Play-Off:
The show has been cancelled. – Joseph Leff

Playwright:
Follow the rules of the game. – Joseph Leff

Pleasant Dreams:
Presents of mind. – Joseph Leff

Plot Cover Up:
Sod. – Joseph Leff

Plumbing Inspection:
A drain check. – Joseph Leff

Plus Fours
Trousers worn by maths teachers

Plymouth Rock
Dance popular among the earlier settlers of the United States.

Pneumonotomy:
Was familiar with tedium. – Joseph Leff

Pocket Watch
A watch for people who don’t like having time on their hands.