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Walter Raleigh
Plymouth Ho School for Naval Children
Name of Pupil: RALEIGH, Walter
Age: 5
Dear Mr and Mrs Raleigh,
This note is to explain why Walter has come home with a sopping wet blazer.
Having lost the toss with Miss Witherington, I was on playground duty this
morning. Now, not surprisingly after the torrential rain we've been having over
the past few days, the playground was covered with puddles.
Walter I notice was over by the sand pit, playing dolls with Elizabeth Shrimp.
When the bell went they came skipping back to class, only to find the way barred
by a particularly large puddle.
I would not have believed what happened next had I not seen it with my own
eyes. Instead of going round the puddle, Walter took off his blazer and laid it
down for Elizabeth to tread on.
The condition of Walter's blazer, therefore, is entirety the result of his own
stupidity. Of course his sandwiches, geometry set, champion conker, Swiss pen
knife and miniature bowls set of which were in the pockets are in the same
soggy condition.
P.S. You should also expect to receive a bill from Mr and Mrs Shrimp in the
next few days. Stupidly, Walter pulled his blazer away before Elizabeth stepped
off it, with the result that she ended up flat on her back in two inches of mud
and slime. In the circumstances, her screech of 'You great Wally' was perfectly
understandable.
R. Mada
School playground supervisor
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