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What musical key do cows sing in?
Beef flat (Bb).
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Teacher: What are you going to do in the school talent show?
Pupil: I’m going to sing “Old Lady River.”
Teacher: Don’t you mean “Old Man River?”
Pupil: No, I’m singing about a lady river – Mississippi!
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PUPIL (after singing a song horribly): How did you like my execution?
MUSIC TEACHER: I’m all in favor of it.
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I didn’t say your voice was out of this world.
I said it was unearthly.
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You have a fine voice.
Don’t spoil it by I singing.
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I like the song you sang.
One day you should put it to music.
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Of course your voice is pure.
You strain it every time you sing.
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MUSIC TEACHER: Now, please sing the scale.
STUDENT: Do re mi fa sol la do.
MUSIC TEACHER: You left out the “ti.”
STUDENT: I know every time I try to hit a high note, my voice sinks.
MUSIC TEACHER: Again you left out the “t.”
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TEACHER: What are your favorite songs?
PUPIL: I have five of them “Three Blind Mice” and “Tea for Two.”
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“That tune has been running through my head all day.”
“Of course there’s nothing there to get in its way.”
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