Funny definitions – the real meanings of words

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P – Pages 1234567 8910111213

Pacifist
Someone who punches you on the nose peacefully

Pack Horse:
All the wolves have sore throats. – Joseph Leff

Packet:
What to do with your suitcase before leaving town. – Joseph Leff

Paddock
Where horse ships dock

Padlocks:
To stuff smoked slamon. – Joseph Leff

Pagan Leader:
An idol man. – Joseph Leff

Page:
Works on the knight shift. – Joseph Leff

Pageant:
To call for Mum’s sister. – Joseph Leff

Paid For By Vanity Fair:
An ego trip. – Joseph Leff

Paid:
Da’s ego. – Joseph Leff

Painful
(1) A glass house (Please remember that people who live in glass houses should undress in the basement)
(2) Having many windows. – Joseph Leff

Paisley:
Compensates Lee. – Joseph Leff

Palatable
(1) Tasty table for monsters to eat
(2) Your chum is seated, waiting to eat. – Joseph Leff

Palate:
Da is tardy. – Joseph Leff

Palaver
A kind of sweater

Paleface:
A visage like a bucket. – Joseph Leff

Palestine:
A wan beer mug. – Joseph Leff

Palette:
A young female friend. – Joseph Leff

Panache:
Felt after a whack with a wok. – Joseph Leff

Pancake Make-up
To settle a fight over the breakfast table.

Pancake
A waffle with the treads removed.

Panhandler
(1) A plastic surgeon.
(2) A dishwasher.

Pantry
The room where you keep your underwear

Pants
(1) Golfers wear two pairs of pants in case they get a hole in one.
(2) In hot weather a man takes off his jacket, a dog just sits and pants.
(3) What trousers do on a long run up a steep hill

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S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z

P – Pages 1234567 8910111213