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Funny definitions - the real meanings of words

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So Long:
(1) Proper length of this dress.
(2) Long hours for a tailor. - Joseph Leff

So What?:
Asked by a confused tailor. - Joseph Leff

So-And-So:
A double-shift at the clothing factory. - Joseph Leff

Soap Opera
Singing while taking a bath.

Sob Story:
The history of Swedish cars. - Joseph Leff

Soccer Mom:
Said by a little boy to his mum about his bratty sister. - Joseph Leff

Sofa:
This distance. - Joseph Leff

Software:
Suede. - Joseph Leff

Soilage:
Old as dirt. - Joseph Leff

Solar Battery:
To hit somebody with shoe bottoms. - Joseph Leff

Solar System:
Pertaining to King Solomon's method. - Joseph Leff

Solar Flares
Trousers worn at space discos

Soloist:
A believer in Han. - Joseph Leff

Somebody:
A mathematician's corpse. - Joseph Leff

Someone:
1/2 plus 1/2. - Joseph Leff

Somersault
What goes with pepper from May to September

Something Fishy:
An act of cod. - Joseph Leff

Something to Kick:
A bad habit. - Joseph Leff

Sometimes Bitter:
Enemies. - Joseph Leff

Son of Genghis Khan:
A steppe child. - Joseph Leff

Sonata
Mr and Mrs Ata's eldest boy

Song For Mrs. Arafat:
Yasser, That's My Baby. - Joseph Leff

Song Writer
(1) Someone who may not be able to carry a tune, but surely knows how to lift one.
(2) A person who was calm and composed.

Sonic:
Pertaining to your boy. - Joseph Leff

Sonnet:
Needed to catch your active boy. - Joseph Leff

Sorcery:
The study of small dishes. - Joseph Leff

Sore Spot:
(1) An aerodrome.
(2) Observed the dog. - Joseph Leff

Sore Throat:
A little hoarse, and buggy. - Joseph Leff

Sound Asleep:
Snoring. - Joseph Leff

Sound Barrier:
A thick wall. - Joseph Leff

Sound of a Fan:
Rah. - Joseph Leff

Sour Puss
Cat that eats lemons

Sourball
A dance for lemons.

Souse:
The opposite of Norse. - Joseph Leff

Soviet:
Amen, or by all means. - Joseph Leff

Spaghetti
A food discovered by a person who used his noodle.

Spankings:
Multi-generational royalty. - Joseph Leff

Speak For:
What a golfer does loudly before teeing off. - Joseph Leff

Species:
What you hear at political rallies. - Joseph Leff

Specimen
Astronauts

Speech Defect:
A malfunctioning microphone. - Joseph Leff

Speechmaker
One who talks while others sleep.

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